Who Makes You Feel Less Than?
Personal Boundary #3
I will not associate with people who treat me or speak to me in a way that makes me feel diminished
Are you still associating with people who say and do (or don’t do-like skipping your birthday, repeatedly canceling their plans with you, consistently showing up very late) things that make you feel diminished? Even if it’s family, it’s a matter of self-love and self-care to distance yourself from these ego-driven individuals.
It doesn’t matter why they do it. They do it. Do Not make excuses for others’ inexcusable behavior. You must wean yourself from their company. If your child was pinched, hit or kicked every time they played with a particular playmate, wouldn’t you protect them by not allowing them to associate with that child anymore?
Well, your wounded inner child would greatly appreciate it if you would prevent anymore pain being inflicted on their tender heart. If you already experienced an entire childhood of being spoken to and treated as insignificant, don’t you think it’s time for a change?
Here’s the tough part—only YOU can change your experience of the world around you. Walk away—head held high. Don’t bother to explain yourself. They know exactly what they are doing to you.
I know it’s impossible to block some people permanently, but that doesn’t mean you can’t greatly reduce your time with them. Keep your eye on them like they’re a rattlesnake napping on a warm rock. If they start their manipulation—leave immediately!
“Sorry mom, but I’ve got a humongous To Do list and I gotta run now. Love you, bye.”
“Oh sis, I’m so happy for you that you finally got that Ferrari you’ve always wanted. But, I’ve got an important call coming in I’ve got to take. Bye.” (click)
“Speaking of weight loss, I’ve got to let you go. I’ve got an appointment to run to pronto.” Hee hee. This one requires you hang up as soon as it’s out of your snarky little mouth.
Ok, so maybe the last one shouldn’t be said in your out-loud voice. But you get the idea.
Listen to your sweet inner child and protect that wee one from emotional bullies. The more loved, protected and significant your inner child feels, the more your hypervigilant limbic system and adrenaline-fueled nervous system can relax. Only YOU can prevent hypervigilance.
Begin now with WORTHY A Personal Guide for Healing Your Childhood Trauma and its companion Workbook. I’ll be there to hold your hand, every step of the way.
Available at Amazon > Worthy: A Personal Guide for Healing Your Childhood Trauma
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